tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41611977525368777202024-03-08T04:42:12.550-08:00Staying Grounded in a Frantic WorldFind peace. Live wisely. Breathe deeply. Practice. Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.comBlogger111125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-83006932494650745882020-07-27T11:56:00.001-07:002020-07-28T07:41:37.364-07:00Happy during a pandemic? What in the world?<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-size: medium; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Yesterday, my husband and I sat on the bank of the Roanoke River. In an instant, the breeze, the sun, the coffee hit me in just the right way, and I was BLISSFUL. In my heart, I was saying, <i>It doesn’t get any better than this. </i>Then an inner voice screeched: <i>Wait a minute! There’s a pandemic! Race relations are horrific! And you’re this happy? What’s wrong with you?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">July is National Minority Mental Health Awareness Month. I realized I already know the answer to those questions I asked myself. There’s nothing wrong with me except that I’m getting healthier. I’m walking the walk instead of talking the talk. For years I was a marathon journaler. I would go deep into mental masturbation about a troubling situation and come out on as many sides of it as I could fathom. In no time, anxiety itched again—first just a little, then<span> </span>it grew until there I was scratching furiously in my journal once more. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Now I know, trouble comes, bad things happen, and there are a dozen horrific things I can latch onto and feel lousy about. Mental health happened when I stopped latching onto those things. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">I no longer nurse wounds and worry myself silly. What I do now is <i>acknowledge</i> what’s going on. Yes, there’s a pandemic. I’m never without my masks. I listen to Dr. Fauci. I carry hand sanitizer in a grapefruit scent that makes me happy when I use it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">And yes, there’s racial tension up the wazoo. But I’m mindful of kind people of all races, and I believe kindness spreads. I send good vibes to protesters, and I interact honestly with whomever it makes sense to engage with about the topics of race, racism, bias—about what I know about being Black in this society for decades, and about how I believe we can move to a new and better place.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">With all that going on, I’m still happy because things can always get worse before they get better. But as the old folks and the religious have been known to say, I woke up in my right mind and breathing on my own. If that’s the baseline, then I’m thriving. So I’d best tap into that good fortune and enjoy it while it’s here. Whether it comes as a great walk or talk with my husband or daughter or family members or friends, or a great meal and a good glass of red wine, or that the bumblebees are just having a party in my oregano bush, I’m down for it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Perspective is everything. Things haven’t been great every day of my life. Every relationship has its dark spells. Then there was that season when my mother went down hill fast. There was a year when I worked so hard and under so much pressure that I prayed daily not to have a stroke before I found a new situation. And there have been plenty more…..<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">I believe a commitment to mental health involves making the best of what’s happening right now. It helps if we’re expecting (with fingers crossed) that it’s liable to get better. But it really is (I’d bet dollars to doughnuts) about seeing something good right where you are.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">So I’ll go back to that previous paragraph and tell you what “being okay right now” looks like when life’s not so great:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-ascii-font-family: Cambria; mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-hansi-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]-->When my relationship was in that dark spell, I listened to all this motivational stuff about releasing the past and opening my heart. And it worked; I felt gung ho and motivated one day at a time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">So I’m all about being blissful—even during these harried times, and I’ll take every opportunity to find something delightful. And don’t you be afraid to give yourself over to delight. It simply makes life better. And that’s what it’s all about. Being alive. Making the most of it. Raising energy. One deep breath at a time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-29732644274924069542020-07-11T14:07:00.000-07:002020-07-11T14:12:42.276-07:00Commit to your well-being<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">With an ongoing pandemic and an unsettling racial climate, staying grounded is more important than ever. My mind reels with conversations I'd like to have with everyone from careless socializers to panicking parents to Trump (I refuse to call him a president because he cusses in public and uses language that's barely fitting for a school boy.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">So today I recommit to meditate regularly. Not for a string of days until I feel more settled. But as a practice. Like brushing my teeth and washing dishes. Whenever I meditate, life works better for me. Insights come out of the blue. Interactions feel more harmonious. My Spirit settles peacefully into present moments throughout my day, and I'm happier. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">No matter what's going on in the world, you have to make YOURSELF strong enough to make it through. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">What practice benefits you and improves the quality of your life? </span><br />
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-41567961143905160472019-03-21T12:23:00.001-07:002019-03-21T12:48:31.557-07:00The Power of Prioritizing Passion & Pleasure <div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">This week I had a remarkable AHA! It was after a magical evening among local booksellers, and Harper Collins representatives and their authors showcasing new books. Wine flowed and conversations about writing and stories and inspiration charged the atmosphere. The night encapsulated this phase of my life which is focused primarily on creative writing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">For more than six months now, I've been finishing my novel, gardening, and cooking with abandon--all things I love. Though I've been a writer since my teens, it's the first time ever that <i>creative</i> writing is my only job. For more than a decade, I wrote grants for education agencies and underserved communities; that was rewarding, but it didn't satisfy my creativity itch.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">As for my AHA...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">My friends know me as an epic <i>journaler</i>. Over the years, my journey has been peppered heavily with all manner of turmoil. Since I was a child, I've regularly (nearly daily) scribed multiple pages to unpack and analyze the angst--all captured in a literal trunk full of journals that have seen me through <i>stuff.</i> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">But recent seasons have generated a single journal with few entries that rarely fill a page.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I now realize that <b>the major cure </b>for what has generally "ailed" me for decades, is <b>to write much and write <i>consistently</i>.</b> It's my passion. It's what my soul craves.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Full-time writing is a luxury, I know, and people's lives are busy and chaotic. But I want to whisper humbly in your ears (because it's hard to hear such advice when the demands are endless.) If there's something burning in your heart, find a space to do that thing. It will soothe you in ways that nothing else will. Whether cooking, sewing, drawing, singing, reading, running, building, crafting, cycling, nurturing, volunteering, workshopping, or whatever it is the makes your body smile, do it.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms", sans-serif; font-size: large;">To paraphrase author Louise Erdrich, let the dust bunnies gather and the plants go unwatered. Author Zelda Lockhart said when her child was young, she wrote in 15 minute clips, in the car between errands. Poet Lenard Moore, mentor to many of us, is relentless about writing everyday despite a loooooong daily drive to his teaching job.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">So heal what ails you by making your passion your priority. Your passion is ultimately what will sustain you as your best self. We often say there's no time. But it can be found. Start by borrowing some from tasks that won't matter to your happiness & well-being.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Try some of these:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<li class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chat less. Let voicemail pick up.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Time social media engagement so it doesn't gobble up hours.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Skip shopping trips & useless meetings.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Be more efficient at work, so you can get out earlier. (I was a HUGE procrastinator while teaching--which meant extra hours at the end of the day. Which meant, of course, that I had to journal about overcoming procrastination.)<o:p></o:p></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Trust me. Pursuing pleasure by engaging in your areas of passion--for even minutes everyday, will do you unimaginable good. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Most recent basket of journals...</span></b></div>
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-78484836042114461092019-01-02T15:21:00.001-08:002019-01-02T15:21:14.487-08:00Reflecting on Lucille Clifton's "why people be mad at me sometimes"<div style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 10pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
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" 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Lucille Clifton</div>
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why people be mad at me sometimes</div>
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they ask me to remember</div>
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but they want me to remember </div>
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their memories</div>
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and i keep remembering mine</div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt;">Staying grounded requires remembering your own voice. For many many seasons of my life, I felt as if more legitimate "others" stood whispering in my ears. Telling me their stories about why I should do things a certain way, see circumstances from a particular point of view. I knew they were just opinions borne of their experiences in the world--their values, biases, tastes, fears. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt;">I wasn't strong enough to drown them out and consistently trust my own truths. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-size: 12pt;">Clifton’s poem reminded me of those times in my life when I contorted myself to fit into someone else's good graces, or earn a nod, or avoid raised brows or critical responses. Times when I turned against what I preferred, what comforted me, what made me feel whole, what I knew in my soul. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br />Now it helps me to envision my soul as a strong and powerful warrior buried in my belly going absolutely ballistic when ignored. A warrior who doesn't care if people get mad at me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt;"><br />Sometimes it's a challenge, but if I don't listen to me, who else will?</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-2195699759552122042018-02-10T15:37:00.000-08:002018-07-17T13:01:26.453-07:00Staying Present Isn't Rocket ScienceToday I had a minor epiphany about <i>staying present</i>. The concept has become a critical part of handling stress and achieving peace of mind. It suddenly became clear to me that being present is actually making ourselves tackle the things that need doing that are right in front of us.<br />
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We've evolved beyond having to feed the chickens to keep them alive and us from starving, or harvesting our crops so they don't go to seed. So now we fail to see the urgency of handling mundane tasks on a daily basis.<br />
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In an era of convenience and incredible amounts of leisure time, we often find ourselves doing nothing important for a large part of our days. When we're channel surfing, watching random YouTube videos, scrolling through Snapchat or Facebook, what we're really doing is vacating. Too much vacating (even a couple of hours), and we've actually set ourselves up for stress and all kinds of problems in the near future.<br />
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How? Why?<br />
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Because when we're vacating, time evaporates, and we're not taking care of what's in front of us that needs doing. Things like....<br />
Washing dishes<br />
Folding laundry<br />
Grading papers<br />
Paying bills<br />
Cooking<br />
Writing<br />
Studying<br />
Reading<br />
Playing with the kids<br />
Communicating with other people in your environment<br />
Working on a project<br />
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When we don't do these things as they arise, we screw things up because they pile up or suddenly should have <i>BEEN </i>done. Then we complain because we're all stressed out because:<br />
the kitchen is now a wreck, and you don't have an hour to spend cleaning;<br />
the laundry takes half a day or more;<br />
the bills accrued late fees;<br />
the health routine was blown eating cheap fast food;<br />
the novel or article didn't get written;<br />
the goal didn't get met;<br />
the grading, shopping, reading, knitting, etc. didn't get done; and<br />
the kids and spouse suddenly seem incredibly annoying.<br />
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What actually happened was we spent way too much time lost in TV land, cyberspace, or just farting around <i>before</i> we did the important stuff.<br />
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So <i>staying present</i> doesn't have to be as complicated as bringing our attention back to the moment and paying attention to our breath. It can start with looking around, getting up, and doing what needs doing. After that, we can vacate into cyberspace or TV land, and fart around as much as we like.<br />
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-28300177444059492682017-07-05T09:47:00.000-07:002017-07-05T15:52:48.237-07:00Pay Attention--ReallyI watched the movie "Deepwater Horizon" this weekend. It's based on the disastrous BP oil spill. That devastating event was totally human error. Taking short cuts. Not paying close enough attention to what was needed to get the job done correctly.<br />
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I thought about how many small and not-so-small problems start with not paying full attention to the task we're doing. Too often, people make mistakes in daily life because they just weren't paying attention.<br />
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Decades ago, I went through a frazzled period of relationship <i>stuff.</i> It was often at the back of my mind when (if I knew then what I know now) I could have compartmentalized parts of my life much, much better. During one of those distracted periods, I wrote checks for my monthly bills. Suddenly, my checks were bouncing all over New York City. Insufficient funds fees mounted, and I had noooo idea why. There were no automated banking features back then, so I finally went to the bank to see what happened. I'd written a check for the full amount of my checking account to the oil company! They just put in on my account. I was lucky they returned the extra when they found out my error. Since then, I've learned to shut off my problems when I'm working or dealing with money. I want my job and my money!<br />
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We're human, and sometimes we go through things that become all-consuming, and it's understandable to be distracted and make mistakes. But that's actually rare for most periods of our lives. For most days of lives, we aren't usually dealing with true emergencies and hardship. And still many are not "present" for large chunks of daily life.<br />
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As a society, we have adopted multitasking and distractedness as a way of life. We commit a slew of safety mistakes on a daily basis:<br />
- talk on the phone while crossing the street with a baby carriage,<br />
- check messages and social media while driving,<br />
- make money transactions while checking a message or talking to a friend,<br />
- chip teeth while using them as scissors or openers,<br />
- put on makeup while driving,<br />
- keep abreast of social communication while performing our jobs.<br />
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It's really important to start checking ourselves before the worst happens. Sometimes the worst is not so bad, but sometimes it can be life-shattering. If you don't know how to focus, learn how. If it's hard to stay away from social media, start training yourself. Tell yourself often that the most important thing is THE thing you're doing right now. <b>Learn to control yourself.</b><br />
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Once you know you have common sense, make yourself use it all day long. Walk slower, breathe, make decisions about what you do with your mind and your body. <b>Don't go around on automatic.</b> If you do, the law of averages says that sooner or later you will be very sorry you did.Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-53788952926507456242017-06-13T13:33:00.003-07:002017-06-13T13:59:17.160-07:00Sometimes it's better to forget....A graduation speaker advised a group of graduating high school seniors as follows: "Never forget where you came from." It was very well received. The intentions were clearly honorable.<br />
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On the surface, I was okay with the gist of it all, but I ruminate and turn things over a time or two. So my authentic response is a lot more complicated--because society, communities, and families are complicated. In some cases, it's almost better to forget where you came from. Sometimes ties with one's past associates, family members, community dynamics, etc. can bog you down and keep you from gaining the traction needed to move forward in life. Sometimes where you came from is rife with drugs, violence, emotional or physical abuse, mental illness. Or sometimes it just wasn't a good experience, and there might have been some <i>toxic </i>overload going on.</div>
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Two Eckhart Tolle quotes speak to the complexity of one's ties to the past:</div>
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<i>1) "Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on."</i></div>
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<i>2) "A significant portion of the earth's population will soon recognize, if they haven't already done so, that humanity is now faced with a stark choice: Evolve or die."</i></div>
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So I'd like to tweak the guest speaker's message in order to incorporate some deeper truths: </div>
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- Never forget where you came from, unless it was emotionally crippling. If it was, forget it as efficiently as possible, and start your future now.</div>
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- If you were raised in lousy circumstances, never forget where you came from, so you remember how to save yourself. (And if necessary, how to stay far far away)</div>
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- Never forget that you're incredibly strong, and sometimes your village is crazy.</div>
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- Never forget where you came from--in the context of how it can help you live a happy and satisfying life.</div>
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And I'll close with another quote (by someone I can't recall)--which basically says, <i>Sometimes the best thing you can give to others is the example of your own life working. </i>Which means, don't let where you came from have such a tight hold that, out of guilt, you try to save everybody, or you're afraid to be all you can be.</div>
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Stay tuned.....</div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Heads up! <i>Mainstreet Rag's</i> latest issue features an interview about my journey as a writer, and my short story "In My Soul<i>." </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Here's the link to order a copy!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://mainstreetragbookstore.com/?product=the-main-street-rag-spring-2017">http://mainstreetragbookstore.com/?product=the-main-street-rag-spring-2017</a></span></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-70382520459362245042017-01-01T15:06:00.001-08:002017-01-02T09:09:26.675-08:00We're better than this....<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>We're better than this!</i> </span>read a bumper sticker on a car in front of me. It grabbed me. Made me say, "Yes. We are. I am." Even before I figured out <i>than what?</i> So on New Year's Day, when everybody makes resolutions, that might be a great place to start. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Here are some things I know I'm better than, and I REFUSE to bring them into 2017:</span><br />
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<li style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><i>I'm better than</i> getting annoyed about things over which I have no control. </b>The other day my friend and I conferred about important things to put on our To Do lists. She offered one for me: "Remember what a good life you have." She's right. So when random things threaten to get on my nerves, I allow myself to focus on one of those wonderful things I have going for me, and move on.</li>
<li><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b><i>I'm better than</i> assuming that I know what's best for other people. </b>W</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">hen someone complains or commiserates, I can listen, but I must allow them to feel what they feel. Often I try to talk a friend or loved one into feeling better. But I'm reading Marianne Williamson's </span><i style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Tears to Triumph: The Spiritual Journey from Suffering to Enlightenment. </i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">She suggests that we make the effort to understand what lessons our pain and distress can teach us instead of trying to escape them. And I agree. So my "fixing" conversations probably get in the way of other people's growth.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b><i>I'm better than</i> planning poorly. </b>There's no excuse for overcommitting and overfilling my calendar. I'm beyond rushing to accomplish ordinary tasks, sacrificing quality because I procrastinated, or feeling resentment because I said "yes" to something that should have been a "no."</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><b><i>I'm better than</i> creating stress for myself. </b>I'm busy, but focused and mellow. (That's the vision I want to hold of myself.) If I think before I speak or move in a direction, then I can cruise most of the time. Because we usually made the choices that led to the stress.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">As usual, I come back to the same thing. Take time to know yourself, then honor what you know. Make decisions that feed your soul. You're better than being on automatic with your precious life.</span><br />
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-91276493788096004152016-10-01T18:28:00.000-07:002016-10-02T07:12:17.190-07:00On teaching, blessings and stiff spines....I love the fall. It officially launches my new year. Feels like new beginnings. I get all reflective and start setting goals. This week I thought about how I started my journey in the world of education and how many fall seasons I made transitions--AT&T to lateral entry teacher, to district grant writer, to project developer, to freelance consultant, back to teaching. All fall changes....<br />
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So now I teach, but I don't really call myself an educator. It's what I do--not what I am. What it is is that I enjoy working with kids who need a leg up. Never knew how much I would until I stopped working at AT&T a couple of decades ago and had to choose something else to do besides writing stories (since there was no life-sustaining check attached to that vocation).<br />
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So I taught for two years in a tiny NYC public school for kids with severe handicaps. And I loved it. I bonded with all these hard-partying teachers and administrators who loved the hell out of our population of teens with cerebral palsy, life-threatening seizures, Downs Syndrome, and diseases you only hear about in movies and medical journals. Many had started their lives in Willowbrook--the asylum Geraldo Rivera exposed and got shut down for inhumane conditions.</div>
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Fall reminds me that we're as lucky as we realize. Fall says to me plant your feet, take stock, and get ready for what's coming. Whether it's kids coming back to school, hurricane season, or frost and the ensuing ice and snow. Life can be tough, but mostly it's merciful if you get your mind right. If you know better than to get "down in your cups" and fall into self pity about how hard your life is right now. Jobs aren't perfect, we don't always get what we want, people don't act the way we want them to, not to mention the weather......</div>
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But.....</div>
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It always behooves me to remember the kids I met in that small school when I first entered the world of education. And to remember their parents who wished their kids had homework or that they could do anything at all on their own. Parents who were grateful for nonprofit organizations who provided a night of respite so they could actually have a normal night's sleep. A night when they didn't have to listen out for a medically-fragile kid. </div>
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So with this change of season, be mindful of your mindset. Keep your spine straight and your eyes peeled on the many ways that you're fortunate. There are so many who suffer in ways that are beyond what you'd even imagine. </div>
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People often say I'm always smiling and that I'm so cheerful. But I've seen what suffering is, so in my heart I know I've nothing to frown about.</div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-89659710367572075312016-08-01T06:59:00.000-07:002016-08-01T06:59:09.648-07:00Casting the Dark Shadows AsideSometimes I think about something from my past that makes me cringe. I imagine most people have similar memories that make them want to cover their eyes and wish they could go back and undo that episode or chapter in their lives. <div>
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When I was in my 30s, I spent a lot of time recovering from my 20s! :>) I had a scroll of regrets that shook my confidence and made me feel less than I should have. I didn't want to send out my stories--didn't want to call attention to myself for fear the past would creep up and bite me in the butt.</div>
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Then I realized everybody's got their own stuff. The self-centeredness of youth made me think my mistakes were of interest to anybody else. (Since I'm not a politician.) We all have our less-than-optimal moments: as children, students, lovers, spouses, parents, employees, siblings, and family members. Many of us have had our dark hours and wicked phases. </div>
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Now and then I'll still have a random memory that makes me suck in my breath and wish I could take it back. But this morning I decided to embrace it all. Might be because I'm reading a LOT of good fiction, and good fiction introduces us to characters who show us all sides of their personalities and history. And that's what makes them come alive and makes us root for them.</div>
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So I challenge you to reconsider your dark shadows. To let them reside comfortably among the finer moments. To do so is to accept all of you--all parts of yourself. Last year I read <i>Learning to Love Yourself: A guide to becoming centered</i> by Gay Hendricks. It was the first time I'd encountered the notion of <i>immediate </i>acceptance of our flaws and mistakes as they happen. That becomes the way to truly meet your potential. Iyanla Vanzant is a perfect example with her boat load of hardships and a past that could've choked the life out of her.</div>
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I realize now that it makes perfect sense to accept it all. I have been a fool many many times, and I'm sure there are many more foolish episodes to come. But the energy spent regretting takes away the positive power from the moment I'm living.</div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-83998239302224260642016-07-12T06:51:00.001-07:002016-07-12T06:51:43.478-07:00In the throes of disturbing news....When horrible things happen, I go in overdrive to find a positive. I'm not a Pollyanna. Yes, bad things happen to good people all the time. Reality is.<br />
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This weekend a group of young people organized a peace rally downtown. They were young adults--from late teens to early 20s. One of the chants they bellowed as they marched was, "This is what democracy looks like!" And indeed it does. All races and genders were represented--a true rainbow of young folks planning, collaborating, and linking arms. I was heartened.<br />
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E.L. Doctorow was my mentor back at NYU. Even though I was a committed writer, like many of my peers, I was both wild and clueless. During one of our sessions, I remember he said he was disheartened by the lack of student advocacy on American campuses. That the Civil Rights' momentum gained much-needed traction when young people in communities and on campuses showed commitment and support. Likewise with Vietnam. He was basically saying young people had to be actively involved in the shaping of their future.<br />
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On Saturday, his words came back to me, and I understood what he meant. Although I plan to be around for a long time, young people now are different from my generation, and their future will, hopefully, be different from ours. I have always said that racism and gender bias <i>never</i> surprise me because many of the same people who fought vehemently to maintain segregation and the status quo are still alive and well. And many who aren't did a fine job of indoctrinating their offspring.<br />
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But those who are now coming of age (at least those in larger, more urbanized areas) have a different history. Many, if not most, have not lived in fear of differences. Interracial dating and marriage, gender choices, biracial children, interracial and interethnic adoptions, interfaith communities have existed during their entire lifetimes. Many of their neighborhoods, classrooms, sports teams, transportation systems, workplaces, etc. have exposed them continually to differences. From my perspective, they've grown up in a world that, I hope, minimizes the fear factor.<br />
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There will always be outliers,. But I (optimist that I am) truly believe that sometimes when bad things happen, it casts a much-needed light beneath putrid underbellies requiring exposure and healing. I sometimes view the victims as souls whose lives become symbolic of change and enlightenment. Change generally happens slowly, and sometimes very painfully.<br />
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When there's violence, hatred, ignorance, I believe fear (in one of its many guises) is the true motivation. On Saturday, it was good to see young people putting themselves out there saying they are not afraid--especially not of each other.<br />
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-66614300828722123842016-02-28T11:35:00.002-08:002016-02-28T15:11:10.028-08:00How to Bless Your HeartOne of the happiest, most content women I've ever known had a hand-to-mouth existence. Her days were unpredictable and often filled with the appearance of dark and random events. Three of her sons were killed in their 30s and 40s. Grandchildren, great-grands, nephews, nieces and even cousins of ill-repute continually found their way to her door in their hours of distress. Their eyes were frequently hungry for whatever she could provide: a couch for a few days, weeks, or months; a pallet in the corner if the couch was taken; a few dollars till payday; or a bowl of whatever simmered on the stove in the tiny kitchen of her two-bedroom, Brooklyn apartment.<br />
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No matter.<br />
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She was always laughing, always hugging. Even if she was chastising. Even as she was saying she was "flat broke"-- and she meant it. She was telling the truth when she said she had just five dollars to last till her social security check came in the mail. And it was usually because she had helped somebody else keep their lights on or bought somebody's baby some Pampers.<br />
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When I was a young woman, I spent lots of time in her apartment. I was fortunate enough not to need anything from her. And her ways certainly were not mine. Folks would have been blinking in the dark, and their babies would have been bare-bottomed if it was up to me. But from time to time, I think about her and realize how much she taught me.<br />
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Her way was to love, and she lived to be an old woman who was loved fiercely by an entire community beyond her own family. She lived by her own rules-- untainted by the opinion or judgment of others. She was exceptional at loving, making do, spreading cheer, and modeling that one can thrive-- no matter the circumstances. I imagine that her rooms were packed to the rafters with angels who kept her lights on, kept her rent paid and provided something to fix for dinner.<br />
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Her unspoken lesson to me was to have the courage to find my path and keep to it. The best path for each of us is the one that suits us. We ultimately don't need anyone to tell us who we are, what we should do, and how we should handle the situations that come into our lives. We have to figure it out for ourselves, learn not to need approval, and begin to value the power of living an authentic life. Once we can do that, we will have actually blessed our hearts.<br />
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-36265307660312761262016-01-25T08:40:00.004-08:002016-01-25T09:25:03.903-08:00Love, choices and the power of parents<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 17px;">I'm working on the expanded version of <i>Salt in the Sugar Bowl. </i>So I'm thinking pretty hard about motivations, choices, mistakes, atonement, etc. Several weeks ago, a group of NC State students included me in a project focused on local authors. They asked me the following question:</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 13.0pt;"><b>What were you hoping Sophia Sawyer's
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 13.0pt;"><o:p>Here's my response-- which </o:p></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 13pt;">I think provokes thought about the extreme power of parenting. We're all on a journey, so there's no real "getting it right." And the sexual revolution that started in the 60s and 70s led to more options that are, historically speaking, still relatively new. So really we're just starting to understand and experience a lot of <i>fallout</i> from the choices that weren't always available to us. So I think we can learn from what we're seeing and start to tread lightly!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;"> Sophia
represents what happens when a woman doesn't know who she is, and she
constructs a life based on pretense, superficiality, and the expectations of
others. Instead of conspiring with her mother to meet the <i>marriage milestone</i>
with a man who fit a certain criteria, Sophia would have fared better if she'd
taken time to understand herself as an <i>individual</i> living in a world that
offers many options. There is no evidence that Sophia actually <i>knew</i> Hunt
enough to either love him or make an informed choice to create a lasting
relationship and family with him. Their coupling focused primarily on the value
of societally-established physical attributes. Had she
developed greater self-awareness about her personality, strengths, and needs,
the entire trajectory of her life would have been different. She would
not have married a man who'd been infatuated with her but didn't take the
opportunity to actually know her or love her. And she would not have had six
children who would ultimately be negatively impacted by her initial <i>wrong
move</i>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;"> I hope
she pushes women to think about the incredible power their life choices have on
future generations. The actions of mothers (and fathers) set the stage for the
issues that their offspring will contend with for perhaps decades, or even a
lifetime. Nobody is perfect, and parents will do the best they can. In too many
cases, however, impulsive decisions severely harm both parents' lives and
those of their children. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;">So Sophia teaches us to</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;">1) truly consider the
relationships we sign up for, and </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;">2) value our uniqueness because we are not
cookie cutter, media-inspired creations who can live successfully by following
a general script for life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 21px;">(Unfortunately, I ran into the following survey. Rather depressing, but I thought I'd include it to underscore the importance of choosing well.) Jeeze!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16.0pt;">Haven't read my novella, <i>Salt in the Sugar Bowl</i>? You can still get a copy (and see what readers have said about it): </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16pt;">http://tinyurl.com/mpsxpjd</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 16pt;">If you've read it and have an opinion, take a minute and write a review. (I'd appreciate it!)</span></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-435544582215536482016-01-03T14:35:00.001-08:002016-01-03T14:35:52.704-08:00Start the new year without that awful codependence....As we start plotting the course for doing things differently in the new year, I dissected one of the core tendencies that creeps up and consumes many people who have abandonment issues: Codependence. Codependence can take a fine life and tear it all to pieces. It can happen to anybody-- given the right suboptimal circumstances at a crucial stage of development. So to help both define codependence and provide some coping strategies, I'm quoting some valuable insights expressed by Dan Millman in his book <i>The Life You Were Born to Live. </i>The excerpt that follows is taken from the section titled "The Law of Responsibility."<br />
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"Those of us who feel a strong drive to support, serve, and assist others can, in our need to give, sometimes <i>overcooperate</i> to the extent that debilitates both us and those we serve. In extreme cases, this tendency to overhelp degenerates into <i>codependency,</i> where we lose ourselves in obsessive focus on other people's lives, pouring out without receiving in return. Codependents assume responsibility for other people's lives far beyond the normal duties of parents or friends or employees. They base their value, self-worth, and even their identities on their ability to help other people, always (rather than sometimes) focusing on others' needs before their own ....<br /> The overcooperation that lies at the core of codependency involves a distorted or exaggerated sense of responsibility, leading us to try to "fix" others' mistakes rather than allowing them to learn from the consequences of their own behaviors. ...<br /> In applying the Law of Responsibility, we support others, but we also accept support; we find a balance between what we think we 'should' do or be and what our heart really desires. We do what we can feel good about inside; if we don't feel good inside, we state our feelings and reach a compromise: I'll do this much, but you'll have to do the rest." That's the heart of responsibility and the soul of cooperation."</h3>
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'nuff said! In 2016, give yourself permission to keep track of what <i>you </i>need to be healthy and happy!</div>
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And if your mind and energy is too often spent on other people's situations, remember something I heard a long time ago (can't remember who said it): When codependents die, <i>other people's</i> lives flash before their eyes. </div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-43162178022034940242015-11-22T07:27:00.001-08:002015-11-22T07:32:28.599-08:00While in the company of writers, the stars aligned and shed light on my self<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Once in a great while-- a very great while, I'll experience a life-transforming event. Back in the '80s <i>Codependent No More</i> fell off the shelf in Barnes and Noble, I picked it up and had to take two days off from work to read and process it. When I encountered Eckhart Tolle's <i>A New Earth, </i>I stayed in pajamas until I'd read it all the way through and taken notes.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Well this weekend, some creaky old door within my psyche flew wide open. It started when I was featured as visiting author at Alice Osborn's Wonderland Book Club to discuss <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Salt-Sugar-Bowl-Angela-Belcher/dp/1599484021"><i>Salt in the Sugar Bowl</i></a>. Participants opened up about their own understanding of and experiences with issues of abandonment, the vulnerability associated with being authentic, tendencies to hide, self-protect and project.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Right after that session of honest reflection and sharing, I drove westward to Asheville to attend the North Carolina Writers Conference. Things got deeper when author Lee Smith stepped onto the podium as the keynote speaker. As far as I can tell, Lee Smith is about as authentic as they come. Her words, her accent, the rich and random stories that seem to percolate from her very being reveal, to me, a life fully lived and processed-- which she generously shares in almos<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">t <span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px;">raison</span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 22px;"> </span><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px;">d'être fashion. That was Friday night.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 22px;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 22px;">On Saturday, an itch--an irritation like an emotional pimple erupted. I had vague conversations about "being an artist" with writers Danny Johnson, Crystal Simone Smith, Grace O'Casio, Rowena Mason, Alice Osborn, Maureen Sherbondy and Robin Muira, respectively. It was vague because I was unearthing and coming to grips with a self-defeating tendency I'd unknowingly cultivated-- that of public self-protection. I thank them all for their (unknowing) parts in clarifying something for me: Art cannot and should not occupy the same space as avoidance, pretense and toxic shame. </span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 22px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 22px;">I believe I have spent decades creating and presenting a self-protected aspect of myself. Parts of my story, my history, are dark and shadowy. These parts have made me gritty (and sometimes coarse). There are other aspects that are tender, optimistic and resilient. But all parts crave expression and acceptance. However, issues of trust, abandonment, fear of rejection and judgment have caused a general apprehension about the safety of being authentically who I am in light of all the places I have been.</span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 22px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="line-height: 22px;">I needed the company of artists at this point in my journey to reveal to me that artists can't hide. The general population may have the luxury of digesting societal norms and existing safely within their margins. But retreating to the safety zones might just do the artist in. In the end, our work, or at least my part of this work, is to have the courage to look under rocks and venture into the shadowy corners. Artists share and push themselves toward greater levels of honesty. We wrestle with and reveal aspects of experiences because they need to come out-- no matter how light or frivolous or dark. I don't believe the artist can concern herself with the perceptions of others, or burden herself with keeping up a persona. Such a tendency, I've learned, will consume the energy needed to turn over the boulders and hold them up long enough to capture what we've seen.</span></span></span></span><br />
<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-16109858136238074442015-10-25T09:48:00.000-07:002015-10-25T10:03:48.674-07:00The Politically UnpoliticalThe other night at a reception, I had a brief chat with some folks about the disturbing nature of current politics. I'll confess that I've always been one of the least informed people when it comes to details about political engines.<br />
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Politics matter. I vote. I hear what the media and reigning powers divulge. I feel I really never know the truth beneath any of it. So I know my well-being can never be hinged on what's happening in the news.</div>
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I care. But I have to care more about my immediate energy field. Let's say I've just watched the news and gotten all the way pissed off by the perspective shared about some heinous situation with implications that far surpass the cursory, superficial treatment given. Say I ruminate and talk about it and manage to get others as pissed off about it as I am. Say I generate a small, impassioned, emotional revolution! Perhaps I spark a lively debate. At that point, I become exhausted with the generation of this whirlwind that simply spends itself out, and we go on about our lives-- with a little less oomph.</div>
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This is my take: There are many spirits who have powerful political energy who plunge bravely into community, local and broader trenches as leaders and change agents. Their passion for this arena actually generates positive energy because it's their calling, their raison d'être. They need the support of those like me as they find constructive venues for change-making. I can rally behind such folks. I can vote. I can be honest about how I feel about incidents and issues on the table. I can take the highest road I know to take. But it's clear that I need not huff and puff politically because I absolutely will not be blowing down any houses.</div>
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So, as I shared the other night, my personal political perspective is about impacting the space I'm in. In my opinion, we have more power in the world if we focus on how we treat the people we encounter and how we make them feel. If we are all wrought up-- even in our homes and communities, we become a little bit poisonous. Constant tirades with our husbands, wives, partners, children, siblings, coworkers or whomever we share our daily spaces will feed the brigade of road ragers, angry kids, rude service providers, unhappy souls. Our anger and frustration-- even over the injustices of politics, spread a pall that keeps the misery going. </div>
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So I'm thinking the best thing I can do for the betterment of my environment is to aspire to be as peaceful, diplomatic, and forward-moving as I can be. I can write about the things that resonate with some element of truth. About how we interpret experiences, move beyond pain, find ourselves as we do the best we can to make positive personal history. I think that's the most challenging task at hand. Positive personal choices are hard, but they help our friends and enemies alike tap into the humanity that we share right here and now.<br />
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-4218501985896337362015-09-27T09:42:00.000-07:002015-09-27T13:38:03.547-07:00If one advances in the direction of his own dreams.....Last week my friend emailed me to say that my novella <i>Salt in the Sugar Bowl</i> was mentioned at a conference. I felt strange and excited and a little short of breath. The thing about writing, for me, is that it's such a solitary and self-reinforcing endeavor. I'm always working on my stories. They never seem ready for the world. When something is actually accepted, I immediately fear that <i>it still isn't quite done</i>.<br />
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Hearing about the <i>mention</i> meant the whole world to me because it felt like an "Atta girl" and <i>success.</i> Because success doesn't have to be defined as some grandiose thing. For me it's knowing that what I mull over and shape into fiction does, indeed, find a place in some other folks' lives.<br />
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When I have so many words and pages piling up in my computer and around my office, this part of my life sometimes seems half crazy. And I don't know about other writers, but my own family has never given much of a hoot about my work. To them, it's my <i>hobby</i>, and I imagine that they look askance at me when I prioritize it over something <i>real</i>. When <i>Salt in the Sugar Bowl </i>was released, my husband's co-worker read it and loved it and talked about it to him on the job. Nardo came home saying, "I've got to sit down and read it!" To make a long story short, he hasn't read it yet.<br />
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But I'm okay with that. I write because it's what I have to do to stay balanced and put voice to the ideas floating around my mind. So I'm blogging to say we need to keep on doing whatever we do that feeds our spirit and keeps us centered.<br />
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And who knows? Perhaps Thoreau's words may actually come to fruition for those of us toiling away, motivating ourselves simply because we know we have to:<br />
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<i>If one advances in the direction of his own dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.</i><br />
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<span style="font-size: 17px;"><span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Didn't read <i><a href="http://tinyurl.com/mpsxpjd" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Salt in the Sugar Bowl</a></i> yet? <a href="http://mainstreetrag.com/bookstore/?s=angela+belcher+epps" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Order your copy</a> today! </span></span></div>
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-71785276684728437822015-08-14T07:53:00.000-07:002015-08-14T07:53:38.955-07:00Happy isn't down the road....<div class="MsoNormal">
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A few months back I told my friend enthusiastically that I
“might <i>never</i> actually retire.” I was referring to my teaching job. She thought
I’d lost my mind. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Never retire?</i> For always,
my ultimate goal had been to leave my day job so I could write full-time. A few
days ago, with my lengthy summer vacation drawing to a close, she reminded me of my
response—checking to see if sanity had returned. I love my time off, so I
barely remembered saying such a thing. <i>Never retire? What? </i>So had I lost my mind when I said I
might never stop teaching?<o:p></o:p></div>
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It dawned on me today just what happened! I’ve come
to the place of <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“acceptance” as a way of
life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Eckhart Tolle says, “Acceptance
means: For now, this is what this situation, this moment, requires me to do,
and so I do it willingly.” He goes on to say:<o:p></o:p></div>
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“When you make the present moment,
instead of past and future, the focal point of your life, your ability to enjoy
what you do—and with it the quality of your life—increases dramatically. … The
‘waiting to start living’ syndrome is one of the most common delusions of the
unconscious state. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Expansion and
positive change on the outer level is much more likely to come into your life
if you can enjoy what you are doing already.</b> … Joy does not come from what
you do, it flows into what you do and thus into this world from deep within
you.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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So my response had everything to do with fully accepting the
here and now, the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">present.</i> Without
even realizing it, I had lost the low-grade frustration and discontent that
used to crop up randomly and frequently. I finally embraced the notion that a
happy life is not something that’s waiting up ahead for us once all our
conditions are satisfied. We often think that once we <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">make more money</i>, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">get rid of
that extra twenty pounds, get a new job, get into a relationship, get the kids raised, fix the roof, get that wart removed, retire, or whatever,
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">then</b></i> we will finally be
happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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People can feel depressed, anxious, disappointed, and chronically
frustrated because the present state isn’t living up to the ideas they have
about themselves and their lives. Since (as I so often say) life is a journey,
it behooves us to keep our dreams and goals alive, but know in our hearts that
our lives are here and now. If you died tomorrow, you will have died waiting to
get to “happy.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ll quote Eckhart one last time:<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Don’t ask your mind for permission
to enjoy what you do. All you will get is plenty of reasons why you can’t enjoy
it. ‘Not now,’ the mind will say. ‘Can’t you see I’m busy? There’s no time.
Maybe tomorrow you can start enjoying...’ That tomorrow will never come unless
you begin enjoying what you are doing now.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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So even though this is the last official day of my summer
vacation, my soul is very happy because right here and now I’m drinking coffee and
blogging in my pajamas. <o:p></o:p></div>
Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-26455785454793050822015-07-23T15:47:00.003-07:002015-07-23T19:07:33.419-07:00Learning to walk away cause you can't change anybody but yourself<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
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I was 22 when I learned to walk
away. I left a man sleeping. <span style="line-height: 200%;">(We'll call him Jerry.) There was no hint of dawn’s first light,
and all I could hear was my heart scraping and bumping with
fear, excitement and motivation as I crept around, grabbed the bag I'd packed and released the knob slowly enough to avoid a <i>click</i>. I had found the gumption to put the craziness
behind me. Too many arguments, too much struggling, too much tension about money and how to spend it. He'd blown one too many paycheck and had pushed for yet another <i>What the hell? </i>vacation.<i> </i>Because, according to Jerry, when you're already broke and already in debt, what the hell difference did another $1000 on a credit card make?</span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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I left because <span style="line-height: 200%;">I was smart but powerless. We were engaged, but I knew I would not put a
wedding band on my finger—binding myself to a life that made no sense to me. So month by month for a good two years, awareness grew like yeast
rolls within me until there was absolutely no space left for blind adoration or senseless loyalty. So that morning I </span><span style="line-height: 200%;">took the elevator down to "<i>1" </i>with a gigantic suitcase, a travel bag, and a backpack. I did
not stumble or strain as I strode across the vacant lot, up the block, and
around the corner to catch the 4:30 train. I did, however, cry the entire length of the ride. </span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 200%;"> But by the time I stepped out into the Atlantic Avenue station, I had the first glimmer of awareness that brightened bit by bit until it became a fully-illuminated truth that I never question: You can't change anybody but yourself. It's a lesson that's best learned young because I think everybody learns it sooner or later. People show you who they are, </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">and</span><span style="line-height: 200%;"> you'd best believe them. It will save you from stress, disappointment and wasted time. It's not about judgment or about who's right or wrong. It's about what works for you and what doesn't. </span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 200%;"> Jerry and I stayed friends, and I am grateful I had the courage to sneak out at dawn. It might be a coward's way out, but I knew I </span><span style="line-height: 32px;">wasn't strong enough to stand up against the arguments and Jerry's charm. So, four things:</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 32px;">1) Pay attention to what people say and do;</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 32px;">2) Don't fool yourself into seeing and hearing what you want to see and hear;</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 32px;">3) You have to recognize when you and somebody are playing by totally different rules or sometimes playing two entirely different games; and</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 32px;">4) When you get off track, you need to know yourself well enough to plot a course back to your own life.</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 32px;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Cv0vmqVrTK4/VbFuXbMQQpI/AAAAAAAAAkM/G9xwEpn_dR4/s1600/walking_away_by_rah_xephon-d3e724f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="215" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Cv0vmqVrTK4/VbFuXbMQQpI/AAAAAAAAAkM/G9xwEpn_dR4/s320/walking_away_by_rah_xephon-d3e724f.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-1732837625593229852015-02-19T10:56:00.001-08:002015-02-19T10:59:16.119-08:00Why I think I'm reasonably sane inspite of many tumultuous periods & longstanding issues! :>)<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I grew up in a rather communal setting. My mother, a brother, and a few of her sisters raised their families under the same roof. Today I reflected on a really valuable lesson that I learned in that setting. Although they were young women with jobs and full social lives, we were a house of routines.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Most weeknights, this is what we did:</span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">arrived home at different times</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">an aunt or mom prepared an easy three- or four-course dinner as soon as she changed from work clothes into house clothes</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">whomever ate but didn't cook cleaned the kitchen (I was always in this category.)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">turned off the kitchen lights and retired to the living room to relax</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">took turns washing up, brushing teeth, ironing, talking on the phone (one bathroom, one house phone)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">watched a couple of sitcoms or a drama (<i>Mod Squad</i>, <i>Kojak</i> and <i>Marcus Welby, MD</i> come to mind)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">ran to get hair rollers during a commercial and did our hair in unison with individual mirrors on our laps (Each person had her own curler bag.)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">dispersed by 10 pm to our respective rooms.</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The house went quiet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">No matter how nuts I may have been during various segments of my life, this has always been my sort of mindless, "go to" modus operandi. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I won't belabor this point, but routines, if they encompass daily requirements for feeling and looking good, breed sanity. When we don't have a system for taking care of the necessities, stress moves in. Fast! We <i>have</i> to eat, groom, bathe, clean up, etc. When these things happen randomly and haphazardly, it's like having perpetual buzzards flying above your head. When they are taken care of systematically, the buzzards just fly away, and you're left with the satisfaction of taking care of the details of your life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So find a routine that works for you. Even with classes and sports and whatever comes, make a blueprint that lays out the order of the "must dos".</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(Man, I feel like <i>Heloise</i>!)</span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fDiI_RRu2I/VOYx2a-APdI/AAAAAAAAAi8/mO-Zu1OZqfQ/s1600/Chores-%2Broutines.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3fDiI_RRu2I/VOYx2a-APdI/AAAAAAAAAi8/mO-Zu1OZqfQ/s1600/Chores-%2Broutines.gif" height="320" width="296" /></a></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-66888288752733007782014-12-31T11:09:00.003-08:002014-12-31T11:14:16.541-08:00Crippling care? To coddle or butt out?My Lord! This is the season of hacking and stiffness, death and bugs. Recently I'm realizing how my energy effects others. When I worry, I come with a whole set of automatic behaviors. I ask a lot of questions. "Are you drinking enough water?" "Did you exercise today?" "Do you think you're ready to go out?" Are you taking care of yourself? I might bring vitamins and tea. I suggest some stretches. I hover and gauge how my "patient" is progressing. It feels like caring. But sometimes its effect can be annoying.<br />
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Jeeze. Why?<br />
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I stopped to consider this phenomenon after I picked up a "tone" from a couple of people I deemed to be in need of some TLC, some intervention attention. So I journaled and meditated and journaled some more. Then it hit me. There are a host of individuals who don't enjoy associating themselves with weakness, sickness or loss. While some like to revel in the attention that comes with being under the weather, others (myself included) do better with the personal space needed to be stronger, to grab one's bootstraps and plug along. Plugging along, for many, is the best medicine. Constant reminders of being in a weakened state can keep you focused on that weakened state.<br />
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With this insight. I backed off and stopped focusing on the "condition." I stopped asking all those questions and resumed treating individuals like whole people. Instantly, the tone changed. The energy got lighter and more pleasant.<br />
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So, yes, some people do enjoy the coddling. But be mindful of who you're dealing with and act accordingly. Sometimes care can be crippling.<br />
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<br />Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-72855207372341981312014-12-04T04:47:00.002-08:002014-12-04T04:47:51.995-08:00Concern for others or fear for self?<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm often the problem solver in my family and friends circle. When someone talks about an illness, a problem, a conflict, etc. my antenna rises, and my mind churns overtime. I can't count the hours that I've mulled over somebody else's hardship of the moment-- unable to rest until I'd shared some possible solutions.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why? Because I love them. I want them to be happy and healthy and free of worry. I don't want anybody to fall into depression, sickness, or poverty, nor do I want them to give up. If I can't solve it, then I can at least be a cheerleader. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But lately there have been rumblings in my soul that question my true intentions. I'm starting to suspect that my motivation may be less honorable than I'd imagined. There are actually two sides to my modus operandi. Yes I do love them, but the other side of that coin is fear for myself.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A while back, my close friend (We'll call her Nora.) was overwhelmed by being a single parent away from her home up north. She was a part of our close inner circle of parents who supported each other regularly by babysitting, sharing about issues, and getting together to socialize. Whenever Nora mentioned going back home, I ticked off a list of reasons why our little city was better for childrearing, education, travel, making a living, and making ends meet. She always felt better about where she was by the end of the conversation, but I now realize it was never resolved for her. Most of what I said was probably true. But the underlying impetus for my aggressive counterarguments was fear that Nora would leave. That I would miss her and her children. That my life would change in a way that I wasn't ready for. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So sometimes my investment in other people's problems might mask the question of <i>What will happen to me?</i> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I now see that the answer to that question is <i>What happens to me isn't important.</i> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">WHAT??!!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It's true. Everybody gets to have their journey. They get to move, fall off the wagon, waste their money, eat lousy food, overmedicate, break the law, ignore their health, lose their minds. Whether I like it or not. My late night phone calls and amateur coaching does not spin other people's lives on a dime. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know that's true because I definitely reserve and protect my right to do whatever the hell I please. It's my life, and it really is nobody else's business how I live it. If I'm not hurting anybody, then so be it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My point: Having relationships means <i>limited </i>involvement in other folks' lives. Sharing opinions and advice when asked is natural and healthy. But ongoing input, observations and monitoring crosses the line. That veers into the realm of wanting what <i>we</i> want for that person. Question your motivation for being involved. Don't ignore the fact that there is a natural life process that requires gathering experiences, abiding one's consequences, revamping, reorienting--- learning.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Things will happen to others on their journey. Our true need is not to always interfere, rescue, invest. Because most of what happens is simply out of our control. Our personal job is to gather the courage to live with what happens along the way, so that we retain the energy needed to make sense of our own lives.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'll reiterate a saying that I love: <i>The best thing we can give to others is the example of our own life working.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 17px;"><span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Didn't read <i><a href="http://tinyurl.com/mpsxpjd" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Salt in the Sugar Bowl</a></i> yet? <a href="http://mainstreetrag.com/bookstore/product-tag/salt-in-the-sugar-bowl/" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Order your copy</a> today! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">And check <a href="http://www.angelabelcherepps.com/" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">my website</a> for upcoming events.</span></span></div>
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http://mainstreetrag.com/bookstore/product-tag/salt-in-the-sugar-bowl/<br />
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<a href="http://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/extension/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.blogger.com%2Fblogger.g%3FblogID%3D4161197752536877720%23editor&media=https%3A%2F%2Fimages-blogger-opensocial.googleusercontent.com%2Fgadgets%2Fproxy%3Furl%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252F4.bp.blogspot.com%252F-PZRiNuetzwA%252FVIBX55fgUAI%252FAAAAAAAAAh8%252FhVQRnal595s%252Fs1600%252Fface%25252Byour%25252Bfears%25252Bposter.jpg%26container%3Dblogger%26gadget%3Da%26rewriteMime%3Dimage%252F*&xm=h&xv=sa1.35&description=" style="background-color: transparent; background-image: url(data:image/png; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: none; height: 20px; left: 193px; opacity: 0.85; position: absolute; top: 1026px; width: 40px; z-index: 8675309;"></a><a href="http://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/extension/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.blogger.com%2Fblogger.g%3FblogID%3D4161197752536877720%23editor&media=https%3A%2F%2Fimages-blogger-opensocial.googleusercontent.com%2Fgadgets%2Fproxy%3Furl%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252F4.bp.blogspot.com%252F-PZRiNuetzwA%252FVIBX55fgUAI%252FAAAAAAAAAh8%252FhVQRnal595s%252Fs1600%252Fface%25252Byour%25252Bfears%25252Bposter.jpg%26container%3Dblogger%26gadget%3Da%26rewriteMime%3Dimage%252F*&xm=h&xv=sa1.35&description=" style="background-color: transparent; background-image: url(data:image/png; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: none; height: 20px; left: 193px; opacity: 0.85; position: absolute; top: 1026px; width: 40px; z-index: 8675309;"></a>Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-71884564432633453172014-10-27T05:14:00.004-07:002014-10-27T05:17:21.508-07:00The cheapest cure ever!I visited an old one at a nursing home yesterday. When I arrived, she was frazzled and agitated, rigid and fidgety. She could not be still and was the very picture of dis-ease. I, as a self-proclaimed jack-leg healer, had brought along a beverage. Old people are notoriously dehydrated. So I encouraged sipping, sipping, sipping until my watery, pomegranate concoction was gone. In minutes (and not very many) her eyes were brighter, she was smiling, and was pretty relaxed. She was responsive and still. It was REMARKABLE what a difference 12 ounces of nourishing liquid can make!<br />
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So as the media tries to scare us half to death with news of flus and viruses, I think the best thing we can do is drink, drink, drink our water (not soda and sugary stuff) until we're certain our tissues and brains are spongy with moisture. (There are a few conditions that limit the amount of liquids one can consume, so this doesn't apply to those who have them.)<br />
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So many naysayers I run across say, "I don't really like water to drink it like that."<br />
My internal response: Oh really? I suppose you're just crazy about:<br />
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<li>constipation</li>
<li>dry skin</li>
<li>brain fog</li>
<li>anxiety</li>
<li>headaches</li>
<li>dry mouth </li>
<li>fatigue</li>
<li>and, oh yeah, increased tendencies toward dementia!!!!!!</li>
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Hmmmnnn......</div>
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Take it from me, hydration grows on you. And you <i>can</i> get enough healthy hydration from water, non-caffeinated herbal teas and liquids that don't have aspartame and sugar (Don't get me started on the evils of aspartame!).</div>
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So do your part to flush your system and pamper your immune system. I'm a witness of the miraculous transformation hydration makes. </div>
Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-82762092484073297752014-09-16T05:27:00.001-07:002014-09-16T05:27:40.217-07:00Growing pains<h2 style="background-image: none; display: inline; font-family: georgia, arial, verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 22px; font-weight: normal; margin: 20px 0px 10px; padding: 0px 7px 0px 0px;">
from Webster's Dictionary</h2>
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growing pains</h2>
<span style="background-color: #e8ecf5; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"> </span><span class="main-fl" style="font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><em style="color: #717274; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold;">noun plural</em></span><span style="background-color: #e8ecf5; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"></span><span style="background-color: #e8ecf5; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"></span><br />
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: pains in the legs of children who are growing</div>
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: the problems that are experienced as something (such as a business or a project) grows larger or more successful</div>
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Love it! I think we're conditioned to avoid pain. We're a <i>feel good</i> society. We recoil when we get uncomfortable, but that second definition tells us that if we're going to have the life we want, we've got to have some discomfort. It's important to know the difference between the pain of unhappiness and that from venturing into deeper waters and uncharted territory.<br />
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I find that my growing pains are mostly emotional. I have worn grooves in my mind by responding to many things and challenges in the same way. For instance:<br />
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When I'm very busy and feel it in my body, I always start fearing what's going to happen to me. I get scared that I <i>might</i> get sick. I look for trouble. I lay in bed thinking about how much I have to get done, then start counting the days till the busy is all over and I can get more rest. I'm very busy right now. On top of teaching high schoolers, I'm stretching myself to conduct creative writing workshops and participate in public readings.<br />
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But, this time I'm going to do it differently! Instead of getting scared because my schedule is tight, I'm going to flip the script and get excited. Let's see what happens if I choose to let some little things go so I can get to bed on time. I'll plan with a bit more detail so I can keep calm and healthy.<br />
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The other alternative is to run from the growing pains, get through the rough part in a blurred funk and pretty much return to the status quo. I'm not saying we should run ourselves ragged. But if we have a vision for where we want to go in life, or we have a passion that we want to pursue, we have to find a place for it. The tricky part is adjusting the old to make room for the new. Of being uncomfortable enough for things to change shape and direction, for our lives to morph into something we haven't experienced before.<br />
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I think it might be the only way to grow into the next phase of our journey. We won't know how to get to the new if we can't endure the growing pains with the right attitude.<br />
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<span style="font-size: 17px;"><span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Didn't read <i><a href="http://tinyurl.com/mpsxpjd" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Salt in the Sugar Bowl</a></i> yet? <a href="http://mainstreetrag.com/bookstore/product-tag/salt-in-the-sugar-bowl/" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">Order your copy</a> today! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">And check <a href="http://www.angelabelcherepps.com/" style="color: #7c93a1; text-decoration: none;">my website</a> for upcoming events.</span></span></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4161197752536877720.post-9889121299248157702014-09-03T04:42:00.001-07:002014-09-03T04:42:44.289-07:00Organic vs. Inorganic<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is a departure from my usual, but life is big and whole, and there are no compartments. Everything informs everything else. And health is a HUGE part of everything-- what's going on in our bodies, how much energy we have, even our emotionalism. There's also lots of speculation and research about how even our food can poison us. I like the idea of eating organic, but organic gets expensive, and I will often grab whatever fruit and vegetable looks good and healthy-- even if it is laden with invisible pesticides.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I ran into this information by Andrew Weil, and found it helpful. I put it on my fridge.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">This is what Dr. Andrew Weil had to say about choosing organic in his "<a href="http://www.drweilblog.com/">Daily Tips</a></span><span style="font-family: Arial;">"</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"> blog</span><span style="font-family: Arial;">:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">"I encourage everyone to enjoy these fruits and vegetables in organic or
conventionally grown form:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Avocados<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Sweet corn<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Pineapples<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Cabbage<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Sweet peas (frozen)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Onions<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Asparagus<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Mangoes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Kiwi<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Cantaloupe (domestic)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Cauliflower<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Sweet potatoes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">According to EWG, common growing practices make the crops listed below
the most likely to contain higher pesticide residues:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Apples<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Strawberries<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Grapes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Nectarines (imported)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">•<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Snap peas (imported)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Plus these which may contain organophosphate insecticides, which EWG
characterizes as "highly toxic" and of special concern:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Blueberries (domestic)"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 13pt;">So, this takes some of the mystery out of making some organic </span><span style="font-size: 17px;">vs. inorganic</span><span style="font-size: 13pt;"> choices. I happen to love Dr. </span></span>Weil<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 13pt;">. And now, he's saving me money!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 17px;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Didn't read <i><a href="http://tinyurl.com/mpsxpjd">Salt in the Sugar Bowl</a></i> yet? <a href="http://mainstreetrag.com/bookstore/product-tag/salt-in-the-sugar-bowl/">Order your copy</a> today! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 13pt;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">And check <a href="http://www.angelabelcherepps.com/">my website</a> for upcoming events.</span></span></div>
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Angela Belcher Eppshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06218742273812418915noreply@blogger.com0